The Foggy, Breaking Dawn

An apple a day keeps the vampires away, wait, that’s not how it goes.

The final installment of the Twilight saga will be released on screen this week and it reminded me of something I rediscovered about a year ago.  It turns out Stephanie Myers wasn’t the only person dreaming of vampires.  When I was in high school, I was always writing something.  Short stories mostly because I didn’t have the discipline to write anything longer.  I started a lot of short stories that I never managed to finish.

I have a Unicorn Notebook from those high school days containing a half a dozen stories, or more precisely half a dozen half-stories.  One of them is about a female vampire heroine named Nikki who finds out that she’s a vampire at age 16.  She can go out in the daylight without bursting into flame (sound familiar?) and she reads minds (again, Edward anyone?).  Oh, and get this, she gets married on the night of the New Moon!  Of course the real horror of this story is that Nikki is getting married at 16.  That’s more terror inducing than Stephanie Myers version where Bella gets married at 18.  My working title for this story was “The Fog”.  I have to admit that Twilight has a better ring to it.

Oh good, an original beginning for my next story.

The only problem with my story (besides lack of entertaining plot, sexy werewolves, compelling drama or engaging characters) was that before I could complete 498 pages about my vampires, I switched gears to write about a 16-year-old girl named Dana on her way to a party. (you’ve probably noticed a theme to my writing back then or at least the heroines) And I have no idea why the heck I was writing about vampires in a Unicorn Notebook.

A lovely book in which to jot down a few horror stories….

I wonder what would have happened if I had kept working on The Fog?  I can all have great ideas all day long, but without hard work and effort put into those ideas they are worthless.  For instance, I’m sure there are bloggers who sit down and pound out a post in just a few moments and publish it without another thought and it’s awesome. Even though it doesn’t always show, I put a little more effort into my writing. (by a little I mean tons of blood, sweat and tears – hey that’s a group . . .) I love writing and the ideas come quickly but the substance takes time to construct and evolve. Mark Twain said, “The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to clearly and logically perceive what it is you really want to say.”  I certainly didn’t understand this when I was 16.

Write, rinse, repeat

Some of you know that I gave up on blogging pretty quickly too about 10 months back.  It became overwhelming.  I felt the need to post something every day and trying to keep up that demanding pace, a 55 hour a week job, being a wife. and a mother  . . .  well something had to go.  I also felt very intimidated by all the wonderful writers out there with amazing blogs.  I forgot that blogging is supposed to be fun.  I didn’t start blogging because I thought I would get discovered and become rich overnight, I started blogging so I could write, because I felt driven to write.  So I’ve finally returned because giving up on writing was what I did when I was 16, but now that I’m . . .  um, older, I understand it takes perseverance.  And lots and lots of practice.

So you may never see dazzling posts and you will not see posts every day.  My goal is to post something at least mildly amusing 2-3 times a week.  Most importantly I want to enjoy writing again.  Because it is fun, right after you mop up all the blood, sweat and tears.  Oh, and don’t judge me for following the Twilight saga.  Us Angry Middle Age Women have to have some guilty pleasures!

Merry Christmas, and Season’s Greetings

I’ve seen several postings on Facebook this holiday season adamantly opposing using the phrase “Happy Holidays” or “Season’s Greetings”.  These same folks are usually angrily declaring that they are Christians and will from here forth refer to this season as Christmas!  This is usually followed with the phrase of “Put Christ back in Christmas” or “He’s the Reason for the Season.”  Of course then you are told that if you are a Christian you will copy and post to your status.  Doesn’t it seem as though these people who are fervently trying to remind us of the true meaning of Christmas might have lost a little bit of it?

I would like to heartily wish every single one of you reading this post a Very Merry Christmas.  If you do not celebrate Christmas, I doubt my wish offends you.  I believe you take my wish in the spirit in which it was intended as any reasonable person would. 

courtesy of some of my angry facebook friends

I apologize for not publishing the best posts lately, I’ve been a little distracted getting ready to celebrate with my family.  I hope wherever you are and whatever you are celebrating you have a wonderful, safe time.  I will be taking a few days off to spend with family – hubby, Tink and the extended members of it – and I’m sure I’ll be good and angry and ready to post more ramblings after the holidays.  Until then, Merry Christmas AND Season’s Greetings and thank you so very, very much for taking the time to read my goofy little blog.

Thank you Maxine.com (I very well may be considered one of those dim bulbs!)

Camel Feet Care and Concern

Finally, help for the Dromedary owner (image from National Geographic)

Do you remember my post from a week or so ago:  “A Camel, A Donkey and Golf Cart“?  It was about a local Christmas Parade and I mentioned a nativity scene in it.  Ok so the nativity scene was a little perilous for the plastic Baby Jesus but still there was a lot of info in that post.  A lot of stuff about convertibles, candy, cheerleaders and beauty queens, but for some reason a lot of people out in Google-opolous have been finding my blog due to their concern about the feet of camels.  Specifically the toes of said Dromedary’s feet.  (Dromedary = Arabian, single hump camel.  Heaven help me with the Google searches that will find this blog with “hump” and “camel” in it.)

Who knew that camel’s feet were such a concern?  I mean are there a lot of camels walking around with ingrown toenails or something?  Because a whole lot of people each day are searching about it.  I had no clue that so many people were in charge of the care of these animals.  I envision a group of men wrapped up in their white robes in the Arabian Desert searching the internet via their snazzy new tablet computer to try to find a remedy for their poor animal’s sore feet.  And instead they find my blog which was not helpful at all.  Just a story about a small town parade.  Imagine their disappointment!

Cover of January, 1915 National Geographic Mag...

Image via Wikipedia

So maybe all those people diligently searching about ailments that affect the feet of their pet camels will benefit instead from this post.  I didn’t find a lot of information specifically about the feet of camels; however, if you need some information about camels, go hereNational Geographic, where I found all this helpful information, is a resource for all things wild and woolly and sometimes creepy-crawly.  Isn’t it funny to think that when we were kids we looked through these same magazines in our elementary school libraries to see the naked savages?  Silly kids! 

I’m just happy I can be of help to all those camel owners.  Now their desperate searches will be rewarded and they can receive exactly the kind of response they deserve!  No need to thank me Camel Caretakers – you’re welcome!

Freshly Pressed Awe and Jealousy . . . and Awe

From myexposition.wordpress.com

There is nothing better than having one of your Blogger friends Freshly Pressed.  Except of course if you are Freshly Pressed yourself.  (Just to be clear, I wouldn’t know about that)  It’s great when someone you’ve been following has that honor bestowed upon them.  It’s exciting!  Mostly exciting, a little heart-wrenching, but still mostly exciting.  You can’t help but be happy for them.  Happy and jealous, but mostly happy . . . and jealous . . . but more happy than jealous!  Mostly . . .

Seriously, of course there is a hint of jealousy but that’s because it’s so fantastic, but I really thrilled when a fellow blogger I know gets Freshly Pressed.  Not in that phony first-runner-up to the Miss America pageant way.  You just know as fellow contestants are crying and hugging the new Miss America and helping her pin on her crown that they are stabbing those pins deep into her skull.  No, not that kind of happy – true joy because they deserve it!

"Just hold still . . ." Miss World 2011 (Who is Miss World??)

The first time this happened with Pretty Feet, Pop Toe, I had just read her post, Grumpy Old Bag and on the following day she was Freshly Pressed!  I was very confused.  I was not confused as to the reason she was Freshly Pressed, it’s obvious that she is an amazing writer, but I thought I must be mistaken that I had stumbled upon her blog the day before.  “Was she Freshly Pressed the previous day as well?” I thought.  “Is that how I found her?”  Did I seriously just have the incredible luck to find her hours before Freshly Pressed did? 

The second time this happened, it was to littlesundog and her blog Day by Day the Farm Girl Way.  I’m not positive, but I think the first post of hers that I read was Real Deer Rehabilitation.  Then I read Lazy Days with Daisy Deer and I was hooked.  I believe I left a very intriguing comment something along the lines of “Wow, that wuz gud.”  Perhaps my comment was slightly better than that but not much.  Then I kid you not, the following day I check the Freshly Pressed page and I see this familiar picture of a deer.  I think, “Hey, that’s a deer.” (again I take a moment to point out how brilliant my brain is) “Are two people blogging about raising a baby deer?”  I double, triple checked and then I confirmed that Day by Day the Farm Girl Way had indeed been Freshly Pressed!  

So I rushed right over to her Freshly Pressed post and left this brilliant comment, “OMG (yes I really wrote O M G) you’ve been Freshly Pressed!  How awesome is that??”  I was just so darn excited that another one of my “friends” had been FP’d that I completely forgot how to properly use the English language.  I had clicked that little button to “notify me of follow up comments via email”, but I noticed that my email wasn’t exploding.  I couldn’t believe hundreds of people weren’t commenting on this amazing post.  Then it dawned on me, “She doesn’t know yet . . .  O M G she doesn’t know!”  I imagined her surprise when she checked her computer later.  I think I even giggled thinking about how exciting that was going to be for her.  I was in awe.

Scott Baio - from Totallythebomb.com

Having found two bloggers just hours or days before they became Freshly Pressed leaves me with the feeling of having had a brush with fame.  It’s like getting that signed photo of Scott Baio when I was 12 all over again, but even better because I knew these folks before they were famous!  Like when the small town girl hits it big and I can say “I knew them when . . .”

Not a rabbit's foot because that was one unlucky rabbit

Hey – here’s an idea – maybe I’m a good luck charm for this Freshly Pressed thing.  It sure seems that way.  So if you are a fellow blogger who’s eager to get Freshly Pressed just beg me to begin following your blog, I’m not above bribery, and you could receive that elusive honor by Monday.  Well . . . maybe . . .  But just to be on the safe side, if you do win, don’t ask me to help you pin on a crown.

P.S.  LittleSunDog not only replied to all of her comments, but she also found time to stop by my blog to leave a comment.  She didn’t forget the little people!  PrettyFeetPopToe replied to all of hers as well.  And they both received a LOT of comments!  More evidence that they are worthy recipients.

P.S.S  I’m off until Monday folks.  Have a good weekend!